Season by the Script - 2026 Week 14 - The Mini-Budget

Bad Company---------------

Division Titles: The Slamhounds pick up the repeat even after a miserable loss to the lowly Vermin, thanks to Wausau's loss in a need-to-win game against the Lengths. BC South still remains up for grabs; Zena can clinch the division with a win over Stockholm in week 15, whereas Stockholm can rest comfortably if they win out against the Soneros and Dragons. If the North Stars beat Zena but lose to the Dragons, this risks some tiebreaker madness.

Seeding: Status quo on 1 seed. Derry is on its way towards winning out the season, but still will want to see some stumbling down the stretch from whoever emerges on top of BC South. Echunga's punched its ticket to the playoffs with a 6-seed clinching win against Harnosand. The 7 seed comes down to Montevideo with a one-game edge and Batman, who will be regretting an overtime loss to Nice. With the Screamers holding a head-to-head win, the Robins need two wins to their tally and two losses to the Uruguayans.

Fail Brigade---------------

Division Titles: Viva la Failure Brigada, where no one was capable of crossing the finish line.
- Paris needs one win out of its final two games to take FB North back; two losses opens the door for the Dragons if they can beat Paris and then Stockholm... ouch.
- Heliopolis survived a scare from the Corpses to move into the FB East lead and can clinch with one more win against either of Derry or the Dutch. Two losses opens the door for, ****, anyone else in the division; look for the winner of Week 15's game between Harnosand and Bwindi to spot the most likely challenger.
- An entirely-understandable loss to a Paris team that looks better than ever leaves the Kings awaiting coronation. A win over Philly in Week 15 or North York afterwards clinches it, otherwise they might come a half-game short against Will Smith and the gang or need to survive tiebreaker madness against the Baguettes.
- Everything that needed to happen happened to make FB West a scrum again. North York slips into first with a tiebreaker over Florence, and they can put themselves in prime position for the crown by beating the Lions in Week 15. They'll want the Fools to drop a game against Star City or Philly to avoid a must-win against Hong Kong in the final week. Penrith is in a tight situation, but if they can beat the Wildcats and Harbourmasters, there's enough difficulty in the way of their peers that they could come out on top.

Seeding: Paris beating Hong Kong means that the 1-seed will belong to FB North's champion, with the runner-up taking the 5th seed as a consolation prize. 6 and 7 are still well up for grabs, with six teams sitting within a game of the playoff race. The smart money's on the 6 seed going to FB South's silver medalist and the 7 seed going to FB South's bronze or FB West's second-place finisher, but this league makes a fool out of the smart money quite often, and someone in the FB East might yet have a say.

And, yes, if you'd told me that FB West could potentially have two teams in the playoffs this year, I would've laughed just as hard as anyone else. But that's why sixteen weeks separate the playoffs from the preseason predictions.

From the back of a napkin to your front door: SBTS 2026 Week 15 - Final Playoff Update

Bad Company---------------
With a tense overtime win against Stockholm, Zena has clinched the BC South crown and a tiebreaker over Derry in the race for the #1 seed. The Soneros can earn a week off by simply matching or exceeding whatever the Mean Machine does in the final week. The Screamers clinch the 7th seed following a win for them and a loss from the trailing Robins.

Fail Brigade---------------
After making the Dragons look like hatchlings, Paris has clinched the FB North and the #1 seed in the conference. Forbidden City will slot in at the 5th seed. The Kings have locked in an FB South crown with a hammering of Philly.

Heliopolis still holds the edge in FB East. The computer is convinced that they're safe from Bwindi completing the comeback and winning the division on tiebreaker. Right now, they're tied on head-to-head, division record, common opponents (or would be tied in this if they both finish 8-8), and conference record. Beyond that, it gets into opaque machinations that MFN has not always been clear about applying in the past. We'll see what happens.

Speaking of divisions no one wants to win, FB West is here. There's one of three routes this can take:
1) All 8-7 teams win or lose their final game: Florence wins the division on division record.
2) Two 8-7 teams win their final game: Florence over Penrith, Penrith over North York, or North York over Florence.
3) One 8-7 team wins their final game: There's your champ.

Wildcards... well. As mentioned, Forbidden City has the 5th seed. That leaves 6 and 7 open. Nice is in by a weird series of events*. That leaves one seat. FB East is out of the running for it. If Philly wins, or if Wildcats and Lions lose, Philly gets the playoff spot. Otherwise, it goes to whoever takes second place in FB West (see the tiebreakers above!).

And that's the playoff story heading into Week 16. Fail Brigade, let's all agree to make things as tidy as Bad Company manages to do every year. No one want to read all this.

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*Florence could pull ahead of Nice on common opponents tiebreaker. However, to do so, the Fools would have to be the only 9-7 FB West wildcard contender, finishing behind a 9-7 North York but ahead of 8-8 Penrith. This also means that Philly finished 8-7-1, since Florence would've beat them in Week 16 to move to the tiebreaker. In that situation, Nice make it as the 7th seed.