The Meathouse Grinder Preseason week 1

-Bone!!! Bone!!!!

-Yes Flesh, what is it?

-We need to get it ready!

-Get what ready?

-The first weekly Meathouse Grinder.

-I didn’t think we were gonna start until regular season?

-Do you ever listen to anything i say?

-Yesss, only not very specific.

-Wel i said that we will do a shortned version during Pre season and more indepth one during regular- and offseason.

-Ooohhh, so that’s what you said, better get started then.

-No need, i knew you wouldn’t do it so i have already done it.

-Thanks Flesh.

-Well can you atleast explain the premesis of the Meathouse grinder?

-Offcourse Flesh, i will. This season the injuries will be comprised of the stats from the health bar, the more injured the higher score, the higher score the better.

-Well for us not for the teams, they want as low scores as possible as high scores mean more injuries.

-Yes. That is correct

-So whitout forther delay her is the first week of Pre-season list

Harbourmasters 452
Lenghts 414
Tardigrades 335
Silverbacks 323
Auctioneers 318
Robins 307
Anarchy 261
Crazy Wolves 255
Screamers 254
Phoenix 253
Baguettes 243
Raptors 241
Violent Vermins 238
Lions 236
Earthquake 217
Arrows 216
Echidnas 211
Soneros 209
Dragons 200
Kings 192
Philly 183
Corpses 182
Rhinos 142
Fools 137
Wildcats 127
Prodigies 122
Mean Machines 112
Slamhounds 101
War Elephants 70
Paris 44
North Stars 31

-That is a very unbalanced list, Flesh!

-Yepp, Some teams got hit a lot harder then others, just one more thing this will be the list during Preseason, but then it will also feature most injured player and maybe some small comment.

-And it will offcouse also show the change from the week before.

-Offcourse it will.

The Meathouse Grinder Preseason week 2

-BONE you Moorrooonnn!!!!
-Moring flesh are you trying to make an impression of his blodinees?
-What, no, why? You forgot to ad Rampage to the list
-Flesh it was you that made the list, on my list rampage is on 178.
-Well anyway, lets not duddle on small things, i noticed something and we need to decide on a very important matter.
-And what matter, Flesh?
-It seems that a player is only listed as injured if the part is below a certain point.
-So?
-Well the part can still be injured even if the player is listed as fine.
-Ohhh, and?
-Well what shall we do, should we take that in to the counting or not?
-Hmmm, i don’t know, maybe we should ask our readers.
-You know what Bone.
-What?
-Sometimes you have good ideas.
-Thanks!
-So a question for this week: Shall we only count the injury on the players listed as injured or on all players?
-Well , while we wait for an answer here is this weeks list.

Tardigrades 703
Lenghts 633
Arrows 586
Violent Vermins 567
Rampage 475
Lions 418
Wildcats 414
North Stars 410
Prodigies 408
Harbourmasters 386
Corpses 381
Echidnas 379
Phoenix 358
Crazy Wolves 345
Robins 307
Slamhounds 339
Philly 315
War Elephants 297
Raptors 274
Soneros 270
Fools 270
Mean Machines 270
Rhinos 253
Auctioneers 241
Kings 240
Anarchy 234
Earthquake 213
Silverbacks 210
Paris 168
Baguettes 158
Dragons 143
Screamers 77

-Lots of changes!
-Yepp and some big once.

The Meathouse Grinder Preseason week 3

-Flesh!

-Yes Bone, what is it!

-The result of the question is in, and though not many answered the concencus is that we should only count the players that are listed as injured.

-Nice! Lets out big sigh of relife, could have been much horder if not!

-I have another idea to spice things up a little!

-Did your head explode?

-What? Why? should it have?

-Never mind, what is the idea?

-We should have our own prediction question every week?

-And what should that question be, The team that gets injured the most every week or something.

-How did you know? Can you read minds?

-No bone i can’t read minds and even if i could you don’t have one to read.
-……….
-Well well back to what really matters this weeks list, enjoy

Tardigrades 764
Lenghts 740
Arrows 716
Violent Vermins 543
Wildcats 542
Phoenix 510
Mean Machines 497
Robins 477
North Stars 452
Corpses 398
Philly 374
Prodigies 354
Auctioneers 344
Lions 343
Harbourmasters 325
Rampage 318
Raptors 299
War Elephants 296
Slamhounds 257
Crazy Wolves 255
Anarchy 259
Silverbacks 235
Fools 220
Earthquake 221
Paris 192
Kings 185
Rhinos 183
Echidnas 182
Dragons 176
Screamers 170
Baguettes 169
Soneros 142

-Is it just me Flesh or are ther more injuries this season, then before?

-It’s still only preseason Bone, there is always a lot of injuries.

The Meathouse Grinder Preseason week 4

-Last week of he preseason Bone, and some teams have sure sent a larger share to the grinder then others.

-That is true, Flesh.

-Will be interesting to see how those teams handle the begining of the regular season.

-You think they might continue to send meat to the grinders?

-One can only hope bone, they have shown good promise for it.

-Shall we share how the presentation will be during regular season?

-Might as well, we can always do a little summery after the first week.

-Sounds like a good idea.

-Okey, so here we go. During regular season there will be no list of all the teams, instead we
will talk a little about the team that contributed the most to the mincemeat.

-That we then sell back to them for a nice profit!

-BONE, DON’T SAY THAT!!!!

-What why?

-They are not supposed to know where the meat we sell come from!!!

-Oups, ehhh, forget what i said, the mincemeat we sell to you guys come from cows!

-Yes cows, that have been eating grass in a field

-We should stop talking now, shouldn’t we flesh?

-Might be the best thing to do, here is this weeks list.

Tardigrades 764
Lenghts 740
Arrows 716
Violent Vermins 543
Wildcats 542
Phoenix 510
Mean Machines 497
Robins 477
North Stars 452
Corpses 398
Philly 374
Prodigies 354
Auctioneers 344
Lions 343
Harbourmasters 325
Rampage 318
Raptors 299
War Elephants 296
Slamhounds 257
Crazy Wolves 255
Anarchy 259
Silverbacks 235
Fools 220
Earthquake 221
Paris 192
Kings 185
Rhinos 183
Echidnas 182
Dragons 176
Screamers 170
Baguettes 169
Soneros 142

The Meathouse Grinder Week 1

-What do you mean no list of injuries Flesh? Why not?

-Well Bone things like that have been done so many times, so i thought that we should do something different.

-Why change something that work?

-Why not, Sometimes you have to change to stay ahead of the times and keep things interesting

-But i have the list done and worked really hard on it.

-Yeah yeah stop your crying, i have made up my mind, if anyone wanna se the list thay can ask for it.

-So what are we gonna do instead?

-Come on Bone, we already said that we will every week focus on the team in each division with the highest injury count, so that is why we still need the list.

-So i haven’t done it in vain then.

-Offcourse not, your contribution is verymuch needed, no leave the actual important stuff to me.

-But, but……

-You can make some comment now and then i promise, Now back to what i was talking about before i was interupted. In the first wee the team with the total highest injry count will be featured ”only injuries listed are counted”, after that the team that have increased the most will be the one featured.

-Okey i get it.

-Good, So lets begin

*sidenote , i count Questionable and higher as unavailible, i know that there are owners who play them so sue me

Bad Company

North
Robins
With 5 injuries in their first game and one Serius on Joey Forearms
Adding to the previus injuries the Robins have 4 players unavailible for the next game, including
C Jeromy Legette who we will not se for a long time with a severly crushed Knee

East
Violent Vermins
Just 5 minor injuries in the first game, the Vermins only have one player out for the next game that is MLB John Fox who tore of his foot in pre-season game 3

South
North Stars
3 injuries added for the North Stars , with DT Stanley Ray out for the next game with a trampled Foot, also out is DT Larry Coley , seems there is a DT shortage in Stockholm.

West
Lengths
The team that top the total injury list suffered 5 injuries in the first game, hardest hit was Edward Keillor with a leg almost torn off, this adds up to a total of 6 players that will watch the next game from the sideline.

Fail Brigade

North
Paris
The coach of the team from the french capital have to wonder what hit them in the first game as they suffered 7 injuries with 4 of them out for the next game Titti Supertonic ”Leg” joins Firenze Wittbenefitz ”Arm”on the not back for a while list, this adds up to 6 players in the stands the next game.

East
Phoenix
The power fo the bird of reseraction is really needed with 7 injuries in the first game but only 2 out for the next game with Terri Partisan in hospital having to sew back his hand , in total 4 players will sit out the next game ”not that bad”

South
Kings
Only 2 injuries in the first game, but Dwayne Bedlam will have problem walking with that foot of his 3
8 players on the injury list and 3 of them out for the next game

West
Wildcats
Arnold Winans are still out on the field crawling around looking for his leg and with 6 new injuries in the first game with two unavailable for the next game adding to the previus 2 the Wildcats didn’t have a really good start to the season.

-Now you might wonder which team coused the most injuries well you don’t have to wait any longer since Bone will tell you

-The most damage coused by any team was The Wildcats who used claws and teeth against the unsuspecting vine drinkers from Paris


So this is how the Meatgrinder will look this season, i hope this will be pleasing to potensial readers.