The Ancient Times

Welcome to the First Iteration of The Ancient Times!
Not to be mistaken for that extremely terrible British Newspaper, this is the original Times, translated from Hieroglyphs directly from the City of Heliopolis.

The Ancient Times will hopefully be a “weekly” paper on the goings on within the camp here at Heliopolis Phoenix, with updates, witty comments, and terrible jokes, lots of terrible jokes.

On to the news! The section you’re all here for I’m sure, Heliopolis Phoenix has been the product of hard work and quite some spending over the preseason, rebranding the previous North Eastern Terriers, The Phoenix are hoping to rise from the ashes of the Terriers and build something new. Don’t ask too many questions on where we got ashes of Terriers, its better you don’t know.

The main goals for this preseason were to bring in Free Agents that will hopefully strengthen and fill some holes in the squad, but also highlight areas which will need to be aimed for during Drafting, a second goal in mind was to bring a decent array of picks to the Draft, to find gems, hidden or otherwise, and also add depth to areas it was very much needed.

Bringing 14 picks to a draft, the Phoenix managed to bring some Deities, strong or otherwise, to the squad here in Heliopolis.

Round 1:
Asim Bastet – RG, Here to protect the QB from diseases, evil spirits, and that dreaded D-Line, boasting an impressive 100 Fut Run blocking, she is going to a solid player in the new O-line.

Round 2:
Kheph Ree – DT, The dung beetle is here, rolling the sun over the horizon to bring light to the team, a solid Fut 100 Run defence means this little guy will ensure no one has an easy time running away from the suns rays, or he’ll just blind them, that’s allowed right?

Set Seutehk – WR, From the harsh Badlands of the desert, Set has shown his face, the harsh nature of the Badlands has strengthened him, but also taught him much, with impressive strength and intelligence, he may not be the fastest WR in the league, but he sure has the courage to go for those catches and knows how to hold on to them.

Continental Geb – C, Whats better than a Rock-solid O-line? A continental O-Line!... Geb, the Deity of Earth itself, is here to protect his QB no matter the situation, with a very nice stat array all over the field, defence will find it hard to get past him to that QB.

Round 4:

Pha Phtah – SS, The first new addition to the Safeties for the team, Phtah is here to show why he is the Deity of Creating and the maker of things, he is going to make some plays this season, mark my words!

Het Hert – LT, Another solid addition to the teams O-Line, she may not look like much, but being the goddess of love, beauty so on and so on, she will surely hypnotise the D-line into being unable to reach the QB.

Round 5:

Heqet Ribbit – C, another O-Liner, there’s a pattern emerging here, This Frog will have the Defence bouncing all over the field!

Nem Ty – WR, Fitting that the Ferryman has an impressive 82 speed, this travelling Deity will be finding routes your defence didn’t even know existed! And by the time you spot them he’ll have the ball in your end zone.

Menhit Lioness – FS, Not to be confused with the English FA Womens team, this is Phoenix’s Lioness, she may not have the best reputation, being a warrior who likes to massacre after all, but she has said she will play by the rules here!... just don’t Pee her off, we hold no liability for her actions on the field.

Round 6:

Aker Horizon – SLB, The Horizon God is here to ensure no one gets past him, just as her guards the gate to the yonder site, he will guard the endzone to the best of his fairly average ability!

Happy Hapi – TE, The god of the Nile flooding is here to flood the field with plays you’ve never seen before! You’ll end up in the mud when she has the ball (hopefully), side effects include riches and fertile soil.

Round 7:

Hunter Neith – QB, no not named because of Smite, she is depicted with a bow often, god! Anyways, Neith is here, not as a pro shooter, because that passing accuracy is woeful, but she is here to show why she is the creation god, and god of weaving, your D-line may think they have her and then shes off to the races, weaving away from all those sacks (Hopefully)

The ones who didn’t make it:

Unfortunately, with new ownership, means a higher level of standards, 2 of the 14 picks this year unfortunately did not make it, which, when said out loud, 12/14 is an impressive stat, but regardless, the following players have been sent to the waiver wire:

Sobek Dundee – CB, unfortunately didn’t boom in TC, and doesn’t have the speed to make any sort of good CB, even with the cracking good name, sobek, crocodile, need I say more.

Seta Ta – QB, Nothing special happening in TC for Seta Ta, not managing to outrank any of the teams QB’s, sadly being moved to the Waiver Wire.

And with all that news out of the way this is the end of this weeks The Ancient Times, Heliopolis are looking to do something special this season, hopefully shock quite a few of those pundits who think Phoenix will only secure 2 wins this season, with 1 game flipping either way. Pundits, who listens to them anyways!

See you next time, whenever the Hieroglyphs have been translated!

Redirected from other thread, apologies for misprint, pigeons got lost!

The Ancient Times

Welcome to the preseason wrap up for Phoenix, it was an interesting story for most of preseason, with the whole squad gaining valuable game time and showing the coaches what they can do. Unfortunately, not every player will be able to make it to the full season, but more on that later. With a 1-3 performance in preseason things aren’t looking the best, but with a couple close games in there, there is no telling what the new coach can come up with for this team. Aaron Medina played an exhilarating last preseason game, making it to offense of the week and showing this team means business.

For now lets talk about the plan for the coming season, rumours around the training pitch is that the team wants… more victories than last season, reasonable enough, that means 3 wins at least. Can the new rookies, Free agents, and trade signings help the squad? Will the team moving to the temple of Atum-Ra mean the gods will look down favourably upon them? Only time will tell. The Elders are the first game coming up for the Phoenix, predicted by some as the division winners this year, I’m certain Phoenix will try to do something about that to stir the competition up. Onto our correspondent Sekhmet for the injury news.

Sekhmet here, with the news on injuries heading into the first game of the season, the medical bay is pretty empty, but with a heavy hitter or two struggling before the first game. WR Troy Hazard and C Brian Gaskell having probable injuries to their leg and ankle respectively. Medical staff hoping this will clear up soon if they aren’t pushed too hard if they play. FB William Halsted is struggling with a questionable foot injury, again hoping to clear up soon, but will likely miss out on the first game for health concerns. The heavy hitting injury I spoke about earlier is Levi Crapulence, picking up the injury against the Crazy wolves to his ankle, he isn’t expected to play any time soon, and may be out for a good 6 weeks still. Will the team bring in a replacement? Back to you in the pyramid.

Cheers for that Sekhmet, Unfortunate news indeed about Levi, wishing him a speedy recovery. Now as we stated earlier, not every player could make it to regular season, with regulations stating there must be a squad size of 53, over to Anubis for the details.

Thanks lads, Anubis here with the walk to the underworld, well not the actual underworld, something about regulations not allowing us to weigh the players hearts against a feather to see if they would make it to the ever after or be trapped in the underworld forever, seems like a very unfair regulation to me, regardless, that meant that unfortunately C Barry Philips and QB Hunter Neith have been cut from the squad and headed to the afterlife- I mean Waiver Wire. There are rumours of a possible 2 more cuts happening to find room and replacements if needed. But no confirmed reports as of yet, back to you in the pyramid!

That’s all for this weeks’ show, we have somehow turned from a newspaper to a show but don’t question it, we have gods and goddesses on the team none of this makes any sense. Catch us on the same channel, probably not the same time, next week!

The Ancient Times

Welcome to the Third instalment to our ancient, better than the current times, newspaper/show/whatever the heck is going on!


We have 2 games to cover here, Week 1 and 2 respectively. Both with interesting goings on and results that were very unexpected.

Game Week 1, what a way to start off the season, 24-6 to Phoenix against division rivals Entebbe Elders, it was an odd game when you look at the stats, fairly equal in net yards, yet the gameplan to run down the clock for the Phoenix was clearly effective, with almost double the possession time. The two big hitters for this match were Alaniz, running 6 yards to manage the Phoenix's first touch down of the regular season. However the shocker of the game was most certainly Medina, managing a 99 yard kick return resulting in a touch down for Phoenix... not once, but twice! shockingly good display of speed and route running from Medina.

On the injury front it wasn't too bad a match for the players. Triplett, Medina, Dudley and Charron all leaving the game with probably injuries requiring some attention from Sekhmet at the medical tent, I'm sure they weren't complaining!

Game Week 2, Phoenix left home soil for the second time and headed over to the Crazy Wolves, Winners of their previous game, both teams went in with heads held high hoping for a solid continuation of their season start. Phoenix managed to pull out another amazing win, showing those pundits what what. the coaches must definitely be proud of the display and grit their team shows. With Medina injured for this match it was up to Alaniz and Halsted to carry the running game, with Alaniz bringing up 23 attempts and 100+ yards, poor lad must have been panting his way off the field after every offensive. The final score reading 26-3 to Phoenix.

More of an injury prone game this time round, not so much in quantity, but the severity will definitely halt the Phoenix run of form in the following weeks. Powers, Payton, Bastet and Alaniz all receiving some form of injury from the match, it is still unknown whether they will get the green light to play in Week 3, or if they'll be rested up to ensure theyre as fit as a fiddle for Week 4.

Due to the amount of Injuries that have occured in the recent games, there are reports coming from camp that the team is looking for a backup T and G, as well as an RB/FB or TE that can manage the FB spot for backups if needed. theres still a long way to go in the season, and the team is already 1 win away from managing the goal that was set by the Team Principle, Certainly will be interesting to see where the team goes from here, their running game is one of the best in the league at the moment. No one expected the Spanish- wait from country, no one expected Phoenix to do this well, but is it still early days to count them as division winner contenders?